In February of 2018, I traveled with six amazing women to India. We called ourselves The Sisters of the Traveling Sari. I have so many wonderful memories and lessons learned from that trip, but spending a couple of days in Rishikesh by the Ganges River was, for me, the highlight of the journey. Rishikesh was the last destination before our trip back home. One of my friends and I decided to change our return plans and remain in Rishikesh for a few more days. On the morning tha

Mom, her daughters and grandchild The day is December 31, 2006. It is a warm summer morning in Nigeria. I wake up to my mother’s excitement about the New Year’s Eve party and fireworks that we are going to attend that evening. She tells me she has dropped off the van at the mechanic's to get brand new tires put on to make sure the car is in top shape for the journey. “You know how the roads are," she says. Around noon, we board the minivan; my husband, children, and a young

I’d like to begin this post with a couple of questions. Take a moment to ponder the following questions and take stock of your answers and attitudes towards children. When you think of children, what thoughts immediately come to mind? What are or were some of your assumptions about children before you had your own? Do you attribute intent to a child’s behavior? What are your beliefs about the nature of a child or a teenager? Too often, adults associate negative traits to chi

I often wonder what the future holds in store for the two precious beings whom I have been blessed to accompany on their journey. When my children were little, one of the best pieces of advice I received from another mother after one of my child’s tirades was, “Ridvan, you are not raising a two year old; you are raising a human being.” That statement and the following quote have stayed with me and guided my parenting approach. “Children are the most precious treasure a commu

When my firstborn was a few years old, one afternoon I walked into my bedroom shortly after I had just cleaned it to find him in the process of tearing it down. My initial impulse was to react and solve the problem, probably by stopping him, or maybe even making him pay for this mishap and disrespect, because we are told that as parents we have to immediately correct our children’s “ills,” lest they become horrible human beings. However, something compelled me to ask him what

I have been blessed with two beautiful souls that I am honored to call my children. They are loving, adventurous, resilient, creative and extremely silly individuals who are a constant source of joy and inspiration. When my son was born, in 1999, I was overwhelmed by the responsibility of being a parent. For me, the question was not whether I could raise a child but rather, how do I raise a spiritual, emotionally intelligent, and physically healthy individual who will contrib